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It's not all rainbows and sunshine here in Hawaii! Anger, frustration, and sadness still find me here. Sometimes I even invite them in!

Part of what makes me a good coach is helping clients through the pain and darkness of shadow work. I can do that because I mindfully dance with my own shadow.

I have been working with a trauma coach to make the most of the (sometimes) painful energies of retrograde, to dig up and process my own pain from a childhood fraught with neglect and abuse. Today I woke up enraged. No amount of gratitude or meditation cooled the flames of rage so I sat down to journal and this is what came out -


Is the theme of my day today

Six planets in retrograde

Dig into the trauma work

Dance with my shadow self

So much PAIN!

A lifetime of use and abuse

A mother who could not love…me…or herself

Men of all ages who wanted to love too much…to devour

Everything I was or ever would be

A world where how much I can make is what makes me worthy

A world where my body is not my own

But governed by the laws of men

Get your hands off my body

Get your words out of my mind


I am a fighter, and I will not give in or give up so I

RAGE! RAGE! RAGE!!! and save forgiveness for another day


Some days you just have to let the shadow rage or cry or scream in pain. Embrace it. Talk/yell it, walk/run it, write/paint it out of your system so you can come back into the light and love and keep moving forward with life.

Much love and aloha,


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